


Put Your Arms Around Me

by BrokenTourniquet



Series: Gold Dust [1]
Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: Angst, F/F, Hopeful Ending, Loss, Miscarriage, SWAU, Supportive Wives AU, so its probably no good, tbh i probably wouldn't be writing this if it wasn't due to the request
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-18
Updated: 2017-05-18
Packaged: 2018-11-02 06:30:09
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,624
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10938906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/BrokenTourniquet/pseuds/BrokenTourniquet
Summary: Anonymous said:Supportive Wives prompt: Kara and Lena had a miscarriage early in their marriage. Maybe it could be a flashback, but the whole thing hurt Kara and Lena a lot, and Alex and Eliza were there for them every step of the way. Im asking this cuz my fam had an experience like that and idk maybe itd be closure for me... also one reason that alex focuses so much on alien biology is so tat she can help her sisters and prevent something like that happening again.





	Put Your Arms Around Me

**Author's Note:**

> Prompt me at: http://darktonic.tumblr.com/ask
> 
> I hope you guys do know you can send me Supportive Wives AU prompts (have I not said that before?)
> 
> Music inspiration: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_q6GJ-MkFsg

“You’ve had a miscarriage.”

It was like shattering glass among the sleeping. Loud enough as it hit the ground to startle those in the room awake with a frightful breath. Like a broken mirror on a wall, giving you a cracked view of yourself and the world around you. It almost felt like the truthful view. It almost felt like-

Lena was the one who had offered to carry. At the time, L-Corp wasn’t hers, wasn’t renamed, not yet. The board was still trying to find someone suitable and she just- she had no interest in it other than the minor role she already had.

Kara had spoken of the idea of a child in passing, really, just for the future and the more Lena had thought about it. It felt right. She felt she could give the love a child deserved, she knew with Kara and Alex, Eliza, any child would have been loved so purely. The more she thought about it, the more she couldn’t stop wanting it.

Family was sacred on Krypton, Lena knew that, and she knew more than anything that Kara would be thrilled about the possibility. The idea alone. There was no solid plan, not really when she approached Eliza with the idea. Eliza had been concerned as they’d only celebrated their first year anniversary two months ago, but she knew that there was no one she could love more than Kara.

Alex had been home and positively thrilled at the idea of a niece or nephew, offering her help as well. Eliza had only smiled with genuine happiness and nodded. Whatever she needed.

The story, the process, it’s long. In short: Kryptonian information had been found, technology had as well, rushed in a way- probably due to Krypton’s unfortunate end. Still, it had been a solid beginning. An agreement had been set, make sure it was possible.

It was odd, but she thanked Lex for his obsession when she spoke to Kara about the possibility. When she answered Kara’s questions, with hopeful eyes, and when Kara had twirled her within her arms out of happiness.

She thanked Lex when Kara dropped to her knees and ever so gently kissed her stomach, letting out a string of promises in Kryptonese. She thanked her brother when her eyes filled with tears. She thanked him even on the days Kara would fuss over her, beg her to slow down, to be careful. She thanked him even when she found herself calling Eliza to talk to Kara about how not-so-fragile she was.

But as she’s come to understand of the world, nothing good lasts long. Not really. Kara teaches her, has taught her, it’s not true, but the day their world was shattered- it didn’t feel so true. Not really.

Lena doesn’t like to think about it, or the months she spent nourishing the life in her only to lose it. She’s blocked it out. Doesn’t think about it. Desperately tries not to remember it, unless she has to. A slow process to get through it.

So if you asked her _how_ it had come to the words, she wouldn’t tell you. Not until she feels herself ready to speak about it. A rare occasion.

She just remembers struggling to sit up in bed, Alex pushing her back down, and a doctor informing her. She just remembers a hand coming up to her mouth, trying to muffle a sob. The doctor looked empathetic and gave them time. She’d turned to Alex and let out a sob. Her sister had crawled into bed with her and held her until her tears had dried.

She didn’t remember the drive home, she just remembered Kara’s hand in her own whispering words of comfort into her ear.

Eliza had wrapped her in a hug and guided her to the couch after, already made so she could lay down. Kara had taken her phone, called her in sick for the next couple of weeks, and was at her side again. Alex had let them be.

The next two weeks drawled on, and at times didn’t even feel real. Like she was just stepping forward. She grew closed, Kara had been there, and she’d been so angry at herself- she had been so devastated. It felt unfair. The world just kept taking and taking from her. Without questioning why it had to _her._

She snapped, once in particular, at Kara. By the end of it, her anger deflated and she felt awful at the sight of Kara crying. Kara had stood there and taken it with her head down until Lena was done. She lifted her head, looking at Lena, and gave the fakest smile either had ever seen and whispered _‘okay._ Before she left, by Lena’s request.

Lena had collapsed onto the floor in a mess and cried harder than before. She had been the pillar, the one she felt would never leave her, her strength and- she’d just sent her away. She felt she’d ruined them. What they had. It was supposed to be forever- they were.

She had been unfair. She felt like her mother.

She panicked and called Alex, giving her a tearful version of it. Making herself sound worse than she was.

Alex had told her to wait for her, that Eliza would talk to Kara, and she was coming.

Alex had come too. Walked in through the apartment door and found Lena curled in on herself, on the kitchen floor. She frowned, her heartbreaking for her sister. She didn’t know what to say, unsure if Lena would be willing to listen. Instead of talking or saying anything, she closed the door behind her.

She discarded her jacket and moved to lay behind Lena, arms wrapping around her securely. She kissed the side of Lena’s face, and let Lena cry and speak without interruption. She let Lena tell her how it was her fault, how Kara deserved better because what she had said equated her to her mother.

Eventually, Lena had let it all out, after weeks of bottling everything, trying to seem okay when she wasn’t- and she felt empty for the time being. Silence settled between them as Alex kept Lena wrapped in her arms protectively and hummed.

They didn’t move until Alex could tell Lena was falling asleep. It was then that she managed to move Lena back to her bed, promising her as she fell asleep Kara didn’t hate her. Lena was her Red Sun, let her feel so...human, part of her world. Kara understood but wanted to give her time and space.

Lena had only nodded and closed her eyes, shifting so her head was on Alex’s lap. Alex fell asleep combing her fingers through her hair.

Kara had given her wife space after that before a talk was inevitable. Lena begged her to just come home because she couldn’t live in a place that was theirs without her. They had talked. Lena had expressed her fears of Kara hating her for what had happened, her feelings, how she truly hadn’t been okay since despite how well put on her mask was.

Kara had been patient and listened, clutching her hand as tight as she could without hurting her. Kara had reassured her she could never hate her. Kara had told her what Alex had, that nothing that had happened was her fault, and that she was part of her world. Beyond important. She didn’t want to lose her.

It had been tearful, emotion-filled, but full of honesty. They were better for it.

Lena felt their strength had come from both Alex and Eliza. She didn’t what had gone wrong, but Eliza had given her insight and promised her nothing was her fault. Alex had come around when they needed her and crawled into bed with Lena, or had just been there. If Kara thought Lena needed space, Alex would keep an eye on Lena.

Months passed.

Things had found a new equilibrium a new pace. They would be okay. They loved each other more with each passing day.

Alex had taken an interest in alien biology, had studied it thoroughly, and she’d kept it a secret from everyone but her mother. Her mother understood. Alex was trying to find a solution, some way of keeping the same thing to happen again in the future. She felt the information from Lex had been incomplete, the scientists who had written it was unaware of different Kryptonian biology could be from human.

She didn’t want to see the same pain, the same heartbreak she’d seen.

Joining the DEO, working up the ranks, it had only given her more to explore and study. It had helped greatly, especially with access to the AI left to Kara. She wouldn’t answer to anyone but Kara, but there was more than just that. She had so much more insight.

The future was bright.

_She could do it for her sisters._

She was going to.

So she studied, continued to in secret, continued to work on it, even as Kara became Supergirl. Even as Lena moved to National City to be with her sister and wife.

She could feel she was close. Every day she felt she was closer and closer. Lena and Kara deserved the future they saw, and she’d do everything in her power to help them achieve it.

J’onn knew. Whenever she’d ask for something more to help in her endeavor, he’d offer it without thought or question. His heart only warm at the thought of what she was trying to do. If anyone could figure this out, it would be Alexandra Danvers.

Heart of a lion, fierce and roaring for her family. She had hope.

_She could do it._

**Author's Note:**

> As I said on tumblr, my condolences. I hope this helps whoever prompted it.
> 
> I probably wouldn't have written if they hadn't asked like they had. If I can help someone I will try to the best of my ability.


End file.
